Still not a runner!

I have a friend . . . actually the same friend who convinced me to start my blog. . . who runs. You know, like in the morning, before work. . . "I was run-ning!" I don't do that. It sounds great, and I am happy for her, but I have never been a runner. She says she wasn't a runner, either. She just started running a few months ago, and some days she's still dragging herself. I'm really proud of her, but it's not me. Aside from the fact that if I ran in the morning before school, my kids would be home alone, there are also other issues.

I was in the Navy for seven years. I went to Boot Camp. But I always hated running. I could march till my feet went numb, but just did not want to run. I don't know exactly why. . . The jarring, maybe? The repetitive motion? Maybe because it's just boring? Whatever the reasons, I have just never been a runner.

There are more things to do to get in shape than run . . . walk, swim, go to the gym! For a while now, it has been time to start doing some of those things. I've spent a lot of time not liking the person in the mirror. It's really hard to get started, though. . . . Especially when you're dealing with so many issues.

I don't want to make excuses for myself, but I do have issues. I am a single mom. I've been working on moving in and getting organized. And for a long time, I've been depressed. This recent bout of depression started when I left my ship last May. I left the ship, my friends, my job. . . and I stood on the pier and watched them sail away. Then I did almost nothing at all while I waited to get out of the Navy. That's when I sank into a deep depression. When I moved here, and moved in with my parents, it was nearly as bad. I had nothing to do; no job, no purpose.

The boredom, depression, and overeating took their toll. I knew that it wasn't good for me, but never had the energy to do anything about it. I became more aware of my health and what I had done to my body when I started school again. And then I was ready to change it!

I know that I am going to struggle for a long time. Before the ship left, I worked out three days a week in port, and every day (sometimes twice) underway. . . I may not get back to that level again, but I will get that body back. Especially now that I have all of my old clothes . . . yeah, an entire closetful that I didn't see for almost a year. I will wear those clothes again.

So, for some good news. My parents don't even know this. . . I joined Curves. I might have joined a gym for less money, but I don't really like the gym. So much equipment. No routine makes it all too overwhelming. My aunt gave me a free week a while back . . . so I took it, and loved it! So, when my parents were on vacation, I joined. I didn't tell them, because I didn't want to hear any negativity about the money, or time management and studying. I'll tell them when there is a noticeable difference in my body -- or if they read this, I guess the secret's out!

Right now I feel great. I don't see any difference in my body yet, but I feel a difference in myself. I have energy, and it's not so much of a chore to go and exercise. The workouts are getting easier, too. I didn't go at all last week. . . I was just exhausted studying and taking finals.

I'm back now, and plan on going, and going, and going. Some days I feel so good that I wish I could do a second half-hour workout later in the day. I'm only down ten pounds from my heaviest, but with the changes to my eating habits, and cutting down on sodas, I hope to keep going down. Hopefully the physical changes will start soon.

Well, that's all for now. I hope it continues to get easier. Maybe someday they'll let me do two workouts in a day. . . For now, one workout and some good food is enough. . .

Maybe I would change faster if I did more, but I'm still not a runner!

Guess that's all for now!

~ Janis